People at Grief Counseling Group

Last week, I attended the Grief Counseling Session offered through OSU's Counseling center. A new person joined the group. She is a grad student. Her brother, who is a couple years older than her, committed suicide last year. He was schizophrenic.

Sara, who I've mentioned before, lost both her parents to cancer when she was young. Her mother passed away when she was 13 and her father passed away when she was 15. She is a sophomore in college, and she lives in her parents' house.

Kaitlyn is a sophomore here at OSU. Her mother was an alcoholic. Her mother had been ill for the past who years, I believe due to the health issues caused by her alcoholism. She passed away this summer. In addition, Kaitlyn's grandmother and Kaitlyn's dog passed away this summer.

Another girl's father passed away over the summer. She was the youngest of three siblings and was her father's caretaker. She's a student here at OSU. She had to take some time off to address her father's needs. He had some form of cancer in the throat or the mouth, I don't remember exactly. Her father's jaw was removed and he was incapable of feeding himself.

Another girl's close friend committed suicide last year. She also lost her mother when she was about one or two years old. She doesn't exactly understand the feelings with losing a mother, just the feeling of not having a mother figure in her life. She feels very conflicted about her friend's suicide.

Lastly, Frank, who only showed up once or twice, lost his mother when he was in the 8th grade. He is currently a graduate student here at OSU. He has had several complications since his mother's death. His mother and father had a great relationship. When she passed away, his mother removed everything that belonged to her or had her image within the first week. Frank's father never talked about his wife's death and the house was eliminated of her existence in seven days. Over the summer, Frank and his family used to go to a beach house his mother loved. His father sold that house within the first week of the loss. Frank felt very angry with his father for years. The still don't talk about his mother. His father has remarried. Frank now experiences problems in relationships. His girlfriends have said that he's mechanical and emotionless. Eventhough he does all the things a "good boyfriend should" (cook dinner, buy flowers, etc), he has difficulties with intimacy.

I've learned a lot through these people's stories. They've helped me make sense of my situation. Sometimes I feel like these people's stories are so much more tragic than mine and me losing a mother should be no big deal. But, I think that we all have something in common, regardless of the degree of tragedy we saw. We all know what it is like to lose someone. We all question life and death. We have this bond together.

I believe I will continue to go to these sessions for a long time. I am intrigued by people's stories and experiences. It makes me question what is the meaning of life and what I should value. I hope maybe their bios make you questions things too.